Make a progress indicator bar function with comedy value

[neechbear]

• Halloween: Braaaaaains
• April Fools Day: Yahooooooo!
• Nyan cat anniversary (of it being uploaded to YouTube): ~~~~~=[,,_,,]:3
• May the Fourth: Luuuuuuke!
• Towel Day: Foooooorty two
• June 4th (??): KHAAAAAAAAN!
• Aaron will be late day: Aaaaaaaaron!
• Pirate day: Yaaaaaaaarr!

Obviously Google-specific in-jokes are probably less awesome though, so find some more globally recognised ones to replace those.