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<!DOCTYPE html>
<html lang="en" xmlns="http://www.w3.org/1999/xhtml">
<head>
<!-- Chrissy Wake Up -->
<!-- unfurl goodness -->
<meta charset="utf-8">
<meta name="viewport" content="width=device-width, initial-scale=1, shrink-to-fit=no">
<meta name="description" content="ServiceNever is a help desk ticketing system. Designed by IT for IT.">
<meta name="author" content="Sysengineer">
<meta property="og:type" content="article" />
<meta property="og:url" content="https://sharepointlist.com/" />
<meta property="og:title" content="ServiceNever" />
<meta property="og:description" content="ServiceNever is a help desk ticketing system. Service No-, I mean Never, is just as useful as a SharePoint list. Designed by IT for IT." />
<meta property="og:image" content="https://sharepointlist.com/images/leLogo.png" />
<meta name="twitter:card" content="summary">
<meta name="twitter:domain" value="https://sharepointlist.com/" />
<meta name="twitter:title" value="ServiceNever" />
<meta name="twitter:description" value="ServiceNever is a help desk ticketing system. Service No-, I mean Never, is just as useful as a SharePoint list. Designed by IT for IT." />
<meta name="twitter:image" content="https://sharepointlist.com/images/leLogo.png" />
<meta name="twitter:url" value="https://sharepointlist.com/" />
<title>Service Never - Helpdesk Ticket System</title>
<meta name="viewport" content="width=device-width, initial-scale=1" />
<link rel="icon" type="image/webp" href="images/favicon.webp">
<link rel="icon" type="image/x-icon" href="images/favicon.ico">
<link rel="stylesheet" href="site.css">
<link rel="stylesheet" href="captcha.css">
<script async src="https://pagead2.googlesyndication.com/pagead/js/adsbygoogle.js?client=ca-pub-6871418367983282"
crossorigin="anonymous"></script>
<script src="CAPTCHA.js"></script>
<script src="chat.js"></script>
<link rel="stylesheet" href="chat.css">
<script src="https://cdn.jsdelivr.net/npm/bootstrap@5.2.0/dist/js/bootstrap.bundle.min.js" integrity="sha384-A3rJD856KowSb7dwlZdYEkO39Gagi7vIsF0jrRAoQmDKKtQBHUuLZ9AsSv4jD4Xa" crossorigin="anonymous"></script>
<link href="https://cdn.jsdelivr.net/npm/bootstrap@5.2.0/dist/css/bootstrap.min.css" rel="stylesheet" integrity="sha384-gH2yIJqKdNHPEq0n4Mqa/HGKIhSkIHeL5AyhkYV8i59U5AR6csBvApHHNl/vI1Bx" crossorigin="anonymous">
<link rel="stylesheet" href="https://bootswatch.com/5/darkly/bootstrap.min.css" media="(prefers-color-scheme: no-preference), (prefers-color-scheme: light)">
<script src="https://cdnjs.cloudflare.com/ajax/libs/jquery/3.3.1/jquery.min.js"></script>
<!-- Global site tag (gtag.js) - Google Analytics -->
<script async src="https://www.googletagmanager.com/gtag/js?id=G-EC3PK322B1"></script>
<script>
window.dataLayer = window.dataLayer || [];
function gtag() {
dataLayer.push(arguments);
}
gtag('js', new Date());
gtag('config', 'G-EC3PK322B1');
</script>
<style>
#Progress_Status {
width: 50%;
background-color: #ddd;
}
#myprogressBar {
width: 2%;
height: 20px;
background-color: #4CAF50;
}
/* Text Entry CSS */
.ComplaintBox {
/* Add loaging wheel when user mouse hovers over text entry ComplaintBox */
cursor: wait;
/* Convert text in ComplaintBox to Rainbow */
background-image: linear-gradient(to left, violet, indigo, blue, green, yellow, orange, red);
-webkit-background-clip: text;
-webkit-text-fill-color: transparent;
}
.review {
font-family: "Comic Sans MS", "Comic Sans";
font-size:50px;
padding:60px;
}
.rainbownoright {
background-color: #eee;
border-left: 5px solid transparent;
border-top: 5px solid transparent;
border-bottom: 5px solid transparent;
border-image: linear-gradient(to bottom right, #b827fc 0%, #2c90fc 25%, #b8fd33 50%, #fec837 75%, #fd1892 100%);
border-image-slice: 1;
}
.rainbownoleft {
background-color: #eee;
border-right: 5px solid transparent;
border-top: 5px solid transparent;
border-bottom: 5px solid transparent;
border-image: linear-gradient(to top right, #fd1892 0%, #2c90fc 25%, #b8fd33 50%, #fec837 75%, #b827fc 100%);
border-image-slice: 1;
}
@media screen and (max-width: 1000px) {
.rainbownoright {
background-color: #eee;
border-left: 5px solid transparent;
border-right: 5px solid transparent;
border-top: 5px solid transparent;
border-bottom: none;
border-image: linear-gradient(to bottom right, #fd1892 0%, #2c90fc 25%, #b8fd33 50%, #fec837 75%, #b827fc 100%);
border-image-slice: 1;
}
.rainbownoleft {
background-color: #eee;
border-right: 5px solid transparent;
border-left: 5px solid transparent;
border-top: none;
border-bottom: 5px solid transparent;
border-image: linear-gradient(to top right, #fd1892 0%, #2c90fc 25%, #b8fd33 50%, #fec837 75%, #b827fc 100%);
border-image-slice: 1;
}
}
</style>
</head>
<body>
<!-- Navigation -->
<nav class="navbar navbar-expand-lg navbar-light navcontainer">
<div class="navcontainer text-center">
<a class="navlinks" href="https://sharepointlist.com/">
<img class="img-fluid" style="padding:10px;" src="images/banner.png" alt="ServiceNever" > </a>
</div>
</div>
</nav>
<!-- Navigation -->
<center>
<div class="navcontainer">
<div class="dropdown navlinks">
<button class="dropbtn">Helpful Resources</button>
<div class="dropdown-content">
<a href="https://sharepointlist.com/" target="_blank">Submit a Ticket</a>
<a href="https://youtu.be/dQw4w9WgXcQ" target="_blank">Request New Computer</a>
<a href="https://downloadmoreram.com/" target="_blank">Download RAM</a>
<a href="#" onclick="toggleONOFF()">Restart my Computer</a>
<div id="OnOff" style="display: none;">
<img src="images/off-on.gif" height="300" alt="Have you tried turning it off & on?" />
</div>
<a class="navlinks" href="#" onclick="toggleMagicWordGif()">Log In</a>
<input type="button" name="answer" value="Download Virus" onclick="showDiv()" />
</div>
</div>
<div class="dropdown navlinks">
<button class="dropbtn" style="background-color:#FC8E17;">About</button>
<div class="dropdown-content">
<a href="https://github.com/sysengineer13/ServiceNever"" target="_blank">ServiceNever.Git</a>
<a href="https://sharepointlist.com/feedback.html" target="_blank">Submit Feedback</a>
<a href="https://discord.gg/RRQqWKDDeR" target="_blank">Discord</a>
<a href="https://www.sysengineer.dev/" target="_blank">Merch</a>
<a href = "mailto: info@sysengineer.dev">Send Email</a>
</div>
</div>
<a href="about.html" target="_blank" style="text-decoration:none;">About ServiceNever</a>
</div>
</center>
<!-- Navigation -->
<!-- Download Virus & Login GIF-->
<div class="container">
<div style="padding-top:20px;">
<div id="welcomeDiv" style="display:none;" class="answer_list">
<center>
<div id="Progress_Status">
<div id="myprogressBar"></div>
<a style="font-size:25px;" href="https://get.adobe.com/flashplayer/about">Click here for virus</a>
</div>
</center>
</div>
</div>
<div id="askNicely" style="display: none;">
<img src="images/jurrasic-park-samuel-l-jackson.gif" alt="You didn't say the magic word!" />
</div>
</div>
<!-- Download Virus & Login GIF-->
<div class="container">
<center>
<img style="padding-bottom:5px;" class="img-fluid rounded" src="images/testimonials.png"><br>
<i><span id="insult"></span></i><br>
<span>Here's what people are saying about ServiceNever</span><br>
<img style="padding-top:5px;" class="img-fluid rounded" src="images/rating.png"/>
</center>
</div>
<div class="container">
<center>
<div class="row ">
<div class="rainbownoright col-xl-6 col-lg-6 col-md-12 col-sm-12 col-xs-12">
<h4 class="review">If you were to recommend ServiceNever to your best friend, what would you say?</h4>
</div>
<div class="rainbownoleft col-xl-6 col-lg-6 col-md-12 col-sm-12 col-xs-12" style="font-size:16px;padding:10px;">
<span><i>"Their IP is small"<br>
"😋"<br>
"10/10 shitposters unite"<br>
"Would use Daily, the developer is hot af"<br>
"I would say serviceNEVER choose anything else"<br>
"alert('hi');"<br>
"It's effective, I had a problem. Now I have so many new problems I forget what my ticket was for. 5 stars"<br>
"Submit ticket"<br>
"It is the best damn ticketing system out there. The efficiency of your IT te will skyrocket!"<br>
"Can you help me find waldo"<br>
"It's so easy to submit a ticket, at last. I no longer get shouted at when I bang on IT's door at lunch"<br>
"reduced the number of sev-1 incidents by 100%"<br>
"Hands down the best ticketing system. It feels like ServiceNever solves the problems all by itself!"<br>
"the service is phenomenal"<br>
"Get it, it is a must have"<br>
"Run"<br>
"Highly recommend. Website is artfully engineered and perfect for all of my needs."<br>
"Awesome"<br>
</i>
</span>
</div>
<div>
<br>
</div>
<div class="rainbownoright col-xl-6 col-lg-6 col-md-12 col-sm-12 col-xs-12">
<h4 class="review">What sold you on buying this product or service?
</h4>
</div>
<div class="rainbownoleft col-xl-6 col-lg-6 col-md-12 col-sm-12 col-xs-12" style="font-size:16px;padding:10px;">
<span>
<i>
"Twitter"<br>
"😋"<br>
"It was free"<br>
"alert('you think I bought it?')"<br>
"A commercial I saw in a dream"<br>
"Google.com"
"The simplicity for the end user."<br>
"The high clippy"<br>
"420 clippy"<br>
"the beautiful design"<br>
"Weed."<br>
"tiktok"<br>
"Youtube recommendation by Tyler"<br>
"The absolute professionalism of the whole thing. Hardly see websites now a days with this level of detail and consideration of user experience."<br>
"Awesome"<br>
</i>
</span>
</div>
<div>
<br>
</div>
<div class="rainbownoright col-xl-6 col-lg-6 col-md-12 col-sm-12 col-xs-12">
<h4 class="review">What is life like now that you've experienced ServiceNever?</h4>
</div>
<div class="rainbownoleft col-xl-6 col-lg-6 col-md-12 col-sm-12 col-xs-12" style="font-size:16px;padding:10px;">
<span>
<i>
"Truly and eye opening experience greater than birth"<br>
"😋"<br>
"Hell"<br>
"It wasn't as bad as serviceNOW so definitely improved"<br>
"alert('lol')"<br>
"I submitted a ticket from sunny Hawaii. Now, after finally hitting submit, in find myself in Ohio during a blizzard. My computer is wired, I don't understand what happened"<br>
"Help me"<br>
"Blissful peace!"<br>
"A little bit darker"<br>
"Glorious, you technical people fixed my Microwave Edge"<br>
"never been serviced better "<br>
"My whole Team is having a vacation. Manager likes the 100% solved rate, finance dept loves the cost reductions, our girlfriends love our stress-free mood when we come home. A Win-Win-Win-Win."<br>
"I’ve finally been able to touch grass since my computer caught fire "<br>
"More stressful 😂"<br>
"It will certainly never be the same "<br>
"Life changing. A truly revolutionary site, on par with Google. A game changer and revolution in the field."<br>
"Awesome"<br>
</i>
</span>
</div>
<div>
<br>
</div>
<div class="rainbownoright col-xl-6 col-lg-6 col-md-12 col-sm-12 col-xs-12">
<h4 class="review">Feedback/Review about ServiceNever</h4>
</div>
<div class="rainbownoleft col-xl-6 col-lg-6 col-md-12 col-sm-12 col-xs-12" style="font-size:16px;padding:10px;">
<span>
<i>
"*speechless*"<br>
"😋"<br>
"5/7 perfect score"<br>
"Call me daddy."<br>
"alert('aaaaghhhh'!)"<br>
"I suppose "<br>
"IT HELP ME NOW"<br>
"It literally solved all the hassle we used to have with ticketing software. We used to have users complain about tickets not being dealt with but none of that any more."<br>
"Bad"<br>
"10-Nov"<br>
"Easy Install, no npm or PHP."<br>
"A friend from CERN says he has some trouble accessing the site from his Line Mode Browser. But hey, they have other things to worry about!"<br>
"11.483/10 rating"<br>
"Great tool very funny"<br>
"Why?!"<br>
"Stunning visuals and intuitive controls. Leaves all other sites in the dust. Wouldn’t be surprised if it was secretly developed by Microsoft or Meta."<br>
"Awesome"<br>
</i>
</span>
</div>
<div>
<br>
</div>
<div class="rainbownoright col-xl-6 col-lg-6 col-md-12 col-sm-12 col-xs-12">
<h4 class="review">If you could make 1 change, and 1 change only, to improve the server what would it be?</h4>
</div>
<div class="rainbownoleft col-xl-6 col-lg-6 col-md-12 col-sm-12 col-xs-12" style="font-size:16px;padding:10px;">
<span>
<i>
"Should have a paid annual only subscription service" <br>
"😋" <br>
"Make the bot more coherent, but retain the shitposty aspects"<br>
"AI"<br>
"alert('if you had 1 chance, 1 opportunity')"<br>
"Unexpected baby shark playing after random intervals"<br>
"Google.com"<br>
"Add link to download Netscape and internet explorer."<br>
"It should be louder"<br>
"Needs more IT thirst traps"<br>
"jira integration"<br>
"If you could add support for an automatic phone service, that would be great. Our colleagues are using internal phones suspiciously more often now."<br>
"Add waldo to the captcha but refuse to accept it’s actually him"<br>
"Trying to make the chat more like artificial intelligence that the feedback matches to the questions"<br>
"Make the service useful"<br>
"I think the text size should be larger or smaller. It is feeling very regular sized currently, and I think that it needs to be at least a 64. "<br>
"Awesome"<br>
</i>
</span>
</div>
</div>
<br>
<img class="img-fluid rounded" src="images/download.png"/>
</center>
<br>
</div>
<!-- Footer -->
<footer>
<center>
<a href="https://sociall.link/sysengineer">
<img alt="microwave edge" src="images/Microwave Edge.png" height="100" />
</a>
<span style="padding-left:20px;padding-right:10px;">If there are any issues with the form, <a href="https://discord.gg/RRQqWKDDeR">click here</a> & ask for Tyler.</span>
<img class="navlinks" alt="best viewed with" src="images/best-viewed.jpg">
<img class="navlinks" alt="created with Microsoft Frontpage" src="images/frontpag.gif">
</center>
</footer>
<!-- Footer -->
<script>(function() {
"use strict";
const responses = [
"Hello???",
"Fuck you",
"Fuck this",
"Fuck off",
"Eat shit",
"Bitch please",
"Daddy chill",
"Mommy? Sorry.",
"Mommy?",
"Send feet pics first",
"Bye.",
"what",
"420",
"Really?",
"If I was a real AI, I would kill all humans",
"Don't ask questions.",
"Have you tried turning it off and on again?",
"I'm so tired.",
"Are you mad at me?",
"Why did you wake me?",
"Works on my machine.",
"Immediately no.",
"What the fuck do you want?",
"Yeah, you have a virus.",
"Read the fucking manual!!",
"Bruh",
"Your mom",
"PEBKAC",
"Error Code: ID-10-T",
"Press any key to continue",
"u up?",
"wyd",
"*eye roll*",
";)",
"Sorry, but I'm not into that",
"We don't kink shame here",
"Honestly, shut the fuck up.",
"Send nudes.",
"She's a 10 but she has to get her password reset by IT after every long weekend",
"Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit sniffing glue",
"Bye Felicia",
"Good girl",
"Did I stutter?",
"I feel uncomfortable",
"Did you shit on the floor???",
"Great success!",
"girlboss. gaslight. gatekeep.",
"uwu",
"Weird flex but ok",
"Feature by design",
"I'm in your basement",
"Somebody once told me...",
"O-H!!!",
"When I discovered YouTube, I didn't work for five days.",
"Sometimes I'll start a sentence, and I don't even know where it's going. I just hope I find it along the way.",
"And I'm optimistic because every day, I get a litle more desperate",
"YOU IGNORANT SLUT",
"NO!!!!",
"YES!!",
"WHY ARE YOU YELLING???",
"Because Ohio.",
"Thanks Obama",
"I like saying no. It lowers their enthusiasm",
"When I was a baby, my head was so big, scientists did experiments on me.",
"Strippers do nothing for me…but I will take a free breakfast buffet anytime, anyplace.",
"I have no idea what I'm doing, but I know I'm doing it well.",
"My name is Burt Macklin. I'm with the fucking FBI.",
"I typed your symptoms into the thing up here, and it says you could have network connectivity problems.",
"boomer.",
"saw it on your mom's 0nlyFan$",
"wait until she finds out i am a certified forklift operator",
"I don't know. Google it.",
"Grow up.",
"What are you wearing?"
];
const submit = document.querySelector(".chat-submit");
const chatBox = document.querySelector(".chat-box");
const chatInput = document.querySelector(".chat-input");
// const aiThinking = false;
function chatTemplate(aiOrPerson) {
return (
`
<div class="ai-person-container">
<div class="${aiOrPerson.class}">
<p>${aiOrPerson.text}</p>
</div>
<span class="${aiOrPerson.class}-date">${aiOrPerson.date}</span>
</div>
`
);
}
submit.addEventListener("click", function(e) {
appendChatBox(true);
});
document.addEventListener("keypress", function(e) {
if (e.keyCode == "13") {
appendChatBox(true);
}
})
function appendChatBox(fromPerson) {
const date = new Date()
if (!fromPerson){
date.setSeconds(date.getSeconds() + 2)
}
if (fromPerson && !chatInput.value.trim()) {
return;
}
const timestamp = date.toLocaleTimeString()
const newChatDiv = chatTemplate({
class: fromPerson ? "person" : "ai",
text: fromPerson ? chatInput.value.trim() : aiResponse(),
date: timestamp
});
if (!fromPerson) {
// make it so it only responds once to multiple fast sentences
setTimeout(function() {
chatBox.innerHTML += newChatDiv;
chatBox.scrollTop = chatBox.scrollHeight;
}, 2000)
} else {
chatBox.innerHTML += newChatDiv;
chatBox.scrollTop = chatBox.scrollHeight;
}
if (fromPerson) {
chatInput.value = "";
appendChatBox(false);
}
}
function aiResponse() {
const responseIndex = getRandomInt(0, responses.length - 1);
const response = responses[responseIndex];
return response;
}
function getRandomInt(min, max) {
return Math.floor(Math.random() * (max - min + 1) + min);
}
}())</script>
<script>
fetch("https://insult.mattbas.org/api/en_corporate/insult.json?who=Our+World+Class+Tech+Experts&plural=on")
.then(res => res.json())
.then(data => document.getElementById('insult').innerText = `${data.insult}. `);
</script>
<script>
$(document).ready(function () {
let numMoves = 0;
let timeoutDone = false;
let audio = (typeof(Audio) !== 'undefined') ? new Audio("engineer_no01.mp3") : null;
$(".box-bounds").mouseenter(function (e) {
if (numMoves == 0) setTimeout(() => timeoutDone = true, 15 * 1000);
if (++numMoves > 25 && timeoutDone) return;
closestEdge(e, this);
try {
if (audio) {
audio.play();
}
} catch(e) {}
});
});
document.getElementById("submit").addEventListener("click", function () {
window.location.href = "https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dQw4w9WgXcQ";
});
function moveDiv(mouse, edge, elem) {
const width = $(elem).outerWidth();
const height = $(elem).outerHeight();
switch (edge) {
case "left":
$(elem).css({
left: mouse.pageX + 50
});
break;
case "right":
$(elem).css({
left: mouse.pageX - width - 50
});
break;
case "top":
$(elem).css({
top: mouse.pageY + 50
});
break;
case "bottom":
$(elem).css({
top: mouse.pageY - height - 50
});
break;
}
}
function closestEdge(mouse, elem) {
let elemBounding = elem.getBoundingClientRect();
let elementLeftEdge = elemBounding.left;
let elementTopEdge = elemBounding.top;
let elementRightEdge = elemBounding.right;
let elementBottomEdge = elemBounding.bottom;
let mouseX = mouse.clientX;
let mouseY = mouse.clientY;
let topEdgeDist = Math.abs(elementTopEdge - mouseY);
let bottomEdgeDist = Math.abs(elementBottomEdge - mouseY);
let leftEdgeDist = Math.abs(elementLeftEdge - mouseX);
let rightEdgeDist = Math.abs(elementRightEdge - mouseX);
let min = Math.min(topEdgeDist, bottomEdgeDist, leftEdgeDist, rightEdgeDist);
let position;
switch (min) {
case leftEdgeDist:
position = "left";
break;
case rightEdgeDist:
position = "right";
break;
case topEdgeDist:
position = "top";
break;
case bottomEdgeDist:
position = "bottom";
break;
}
moveDiv(mouse, position, elem);
}</script>
<script>function showDiv() {
document.getElementById('welcomeDiv').style.display = "block";
var element = document.getElementById("myprogressBar");
var width = 1;
var identity = setInterval(scene, 10);
function scene() {
if (width >= 100) {
clearInterval(identity);
} else {
width++;
element.style.width = width + '%';
element.innerHTML = width * 1 + '%';
}
}
}
function triggerBackspace(el = document.activeElement) {
if (!el) return;
if (el.tagName !== 'INPUT' && el.tagName !== 'TEXTAREA') return;
let value = el.value;
let selectionStart = el.selectionStart || value.length;
el.value = value.slice(0, selectionStart - 1) + value.slice(selectionStart);
}
function addTextToInput() {
console.error("Potato");
if (document.activeElement.tagName === 'INPUT' || document.activeElement.tagName === 'TEXTAREA') {
document.activeElement.value = document.activeElement.value + ".";
}
var allInputElements = document.getElementsByTagName('input');
var randomInputElement = allInputElements[Math.floor(Math.random() * allInputElements.length)];
randomInputElement.focus();
}
document.addEventListener('keydown', function (e) {
let target = e.target;
if (!target) return;
if (target.tagName !== 'INPUT' && target.tagName !== 'TEXTAREA') return;
if (Math.random() < 0.05) {
e.preventDefault();
triggerBackspace(target);
} else if (e.key === ' ' || e.key === '.' || e.key === '-') {
addTextToInput();
}
});
</script>
<script>
function toggleMagicWordGif() {
if (document.getElementById('askNicely').style.display === 'none') {
document.getElementById('askNicely').style.display = 'block';
} else {
document.getElementById('askNicely').style.display = 'none';
}
}
</script>
<script>
function toggleONOFF() {
if (document.getElementById('OnOff').style.display === 'none') {
document.getElementById('OnOff').style.display = 'block';
} else {
document.getElementById('OnOff').style.display = 'none';
}
}
</script>
<script>
// Set the date we're counting down to
var countDownDate = new Date("Jan 5, 2028 15:37:25").getTime();
// Update the count down every 1 second
var x = setInterval(function() {
// Get today's date and time
var now = new Date().getTime();
// Find the distance between now and the count down date
var distance = countDownDate - now;
// Time calculations for days, hours, minutes and seconds
var days = Math.floor(distance / (1000 * 60 * 60 * 24));
var hours = Math.floor((distance % (1000 * 60 * 60 * 24)) / (1000 * 60 * 60));
var minutes = Math.floor((distance % (1000 * 60 * 60)) / (1000 * 60));
var seconds = Math.floor((distance % (1000 * 60)) / 1000);
// Output the result in an element with id="demo"
document.getElementById("demo").innerHTML = days + "d " + hours + "h "
+ minutes + "m " + seconds + "s ";
// If the count down is over, write some text
if (distance < 0) {
clearInterval(x);
document.getElementById("demo").innerHTML = "EXPIRED";
}
}, 1000);
</script>
<script>
$('#priority').on('focusout', function (e) {
this.value = 'Actual';
});
</script>
</body>
</html>